S. Darko (2009) Starring Daveigh Chase, Briana Evigan & James Lafferty Directed by Chris Fisher Written by Nathan Atkins

Still curious? If your curiosity forces your continued interest in this film, here's what you should know. Spoilers abound.

Seven years after the death of the titular original film star Donnie Darko, we pick up on the trail of his little sister Samantha Darko (Daveigh Chase reprising the role). Now 18, Sam is on a road trip with her buddy Corey (Briana Evigan), when their car breaks down in a Podunk town filled to the brim with quirky characters. Try as she might to escape the shadow of Donnie and his death, which has shattered her family, the hand of God seems to have other plans, as Sam has wandered into the heart of the apocalypse.

A chain of events is set off by the near death of Iraq war vet Jack (James Lafferty, looking a LOT like Jake Gyllenhal here), who narrowly escapes being crushed by a meteor, and resumes his life of muttering to himself nervously, suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome. An irradiated nerd, a mysterious preacher, his bible-beating love interest, and a guy who wishes he was in Grease all act as components to the apocalypse, all acted upon by the twin catalysts of Sam's arrival in town and the meteor's crash.

Anyone who's seen Donnie Darko can tell where this is all going. This improbable sequel follows in Donnie's footsteps perhaps too closely. Cryptic dream sequences, the creation of the bunny mask, and a certain mysterious preacher abusing neighborhood children (no Patrick Swayze charm, this time around though), it's all too familiar. And all of it no more than set pieces aimed at getting Sam in the right place at the right time to avert the apocalypse by...

Well, that's really the interesting part of S. Darko, as a sequel. While Donnie Darko revolved around the idea that Donnie was instrumental in bringing about the apocalypse, and was meant to die under the engine of that jet, S. Darko places our main character in the shoes of Frank the Bunny. Sam isn't at the center of some great cosmic mystery this time around, rather she's on the outside looking in, much like the audience. She is the character that goes out in her dreams, delivering cryptic messages to Iraq Jack, who is the focus of it all.

Of course, this doesn't necessarily make for good cinema, despite the interesting direction of the story. If Samantha realized at any point that Jack was supposed to be crushed by a meteor, and used her dream-messaging or time traveling powers to fix things consciously; or maybe used her experiences gleaned from Donnie's journal to solve the puzzle, that might be one thing. But Sam has no idea what the hell is going on at any point. Her goal in the movie is to find out what happened to a group of missing children. And she does. And then she, totally by accident, convinces Jack to kill himself just the way that Donnie did. This makes the movie no more than a series of bizarre vignettes that do nothing more than try to invoke the spirit of the original film. Moreover, the plot of the missing children is ultimately unresolved and pointless, and Sam and Jack's time-jump at film's end nullifies the timeline where the children were saved. Seriously, you see one still locked in a cage just before the end credits.

And I suppose that's S. Darko's real problem, even more than being a re-hash of Donnie Darko, is that the whole excursion is pointless. The best example of this fact comes from the mid-film shocker of Sam being crushed by a car and dying. In a turn right out of Psycho, the story stops being about our main antagonist, and instead focuses on Corey, the heartbroken friend. Of course, eventually Corey manages to travel back in time and sacrifice herself in Sam's place, making every scene Corey was in following Sam's death irrelevant. The fact that Sam travels back in time later to the beginning of the movie and stops this entire chain of events renders both deaths inconsequential, and the entire film sequence nothing more than a colossal waste of time.

By the end of the movie, everything the main characters have accomplished and learned is undone. This worked more with Donnie Darko, because at least Donnie retained his memories of all the past events, and really the film was about him sacrificing himself to save his family and home from Armageddon, anyway. But here, a second tier character bites the big one for some unknowable purpose, and the main character walks away, with nothing else of relevance having occurred.

Donnie also worked because it was the first time many viewers had been assailed by a film so slickly stylish and so abstract. It was cool and new. Here, the gag is simply played out.

Really, it's a shame, because with a few tweaks, it's possible the movie could have been good. It's pretty well performed by a cast of actors with minimal experience (Elizabeth Berkley of Showgirls and Saved by the Bell being the front-runner), excellently shot, and the effects and visuals all around are very well done. This is a well put together film. Were this the first film in the series, it might have done what Donnie did, garnering a cult following of sorts. Unfortunately, this movie is just that, Donnie's little sister. It's trying hard to be like big brother, but ultimately, it's just a whiny and annoying copycat.

If you decide to pick p S. Darko, despite my having spoiled the whole movie for you, you'll find a convoluted mess of a story with a few cool visuals and a couple nifty scenes to enjoy. But if you never see S. Darko in your life, I can't say you'd be missing anything.